Faith and Fire

It’s almost 10 o’clock in the evening. I’m sitting here on the couch while my little brother watches the movie, “Facing the Giants” nearby. The story line follows fictional football coach, Grant Taylor, who has coached the Shiloh Eagles for 6 seasons with minimal success. He and his wife are unable to have children and he nearly loses his job. Dreams lie in shattered pieces about them.

As the movie progresses, Grant and his wife seek a deeper experience of trust in God….an experience which paves the path for revival throughout the entire academy where Grant coaches, a winning football season, and a miracle conception. The message? We serve a God of miracles. We do.

In my last post I mentioned a far-from-comprehensive list of the miracles God has performed in my personal life. (EMT class is going great, by the way.) Still, as I sit here tonight, I struggle again with disbelief.

20160407_165444You see, tonight my mother is in the ER. She’s been there for over five hours and I still haven’t heard anything. I’m scared. Just like when I was younger, I’m scared.

My stomach twists, my appetite completely a thing of the past.

I’m almost finished with my EMT class, but I still can’t do anything. I’m helpless sitting here with the little siblings wondering if she’s going to be okay…and wondering how we’ll ever go on if this time she’s not.

Is it another odd scare? She’ll be just fine as soon as she rests a few days? Or is it serious this time? Is she going to come home?  Are they going to give her a short time to live? Are they going to give her a clean bill of health? Can they make her pain go away and spare her life?

I don’t know.

That’s the excruciatingly hard truth. I don’t know.

So I continue to sit here. I stand still and trust an unknown future to a known God. It sounds easier as a cliche, but it is SO hard in reality.

Almighty God, tonight I give my mother again to you. I love her more than seems possible, but I know somehow you love her so much more. Carry her, hold her, comfort her, strengthen her. When I am weak, You are strong…I trust Your strength to be enough.

Quick Update

Earlier this evening, as I was sitting on my bed looking over some papers, my Mom called my name. I jumped up and went out to the living room to see what she needed. “The last time you updated your blog was a YEAR ago?!?!?” She had called me because she was wondering if I’d like her to put a link to my blog in a new post that she was writing for Hasten Home. I said “sure” about the link, but I honestly hadn’t realized it’d been THAT LONG since I last posted an update on here!

 

So real quick in 2013 (my last update was posted in January)…

January, February and most of March were spent fundraising for Mission Experience. That was a very faith-trying experience, in and of itself, which makes for some awesome stories I’ll have to write about later…

The end of March-the end of April were spent in the Philippines on Mission Experience (which will soon have at least one blog post dedicated to telling the amazing experiences involved…)

June…What did I do in June? 🙂

July: I was once again blessed by the awesome opportunity to attend YD camp! Maybe I’ll write a separate post about that, too…

August: Well, it’s August now and I’m currently trying to update my poor, dear blog friends… 😉 Really, I’m praying and seeking, trying to discover God’s will for my life. Seems college is not currently in the plans, as much as I’ve wanted it to be for the last couple years. I have an idea about what He might want me to do now so I’m moving forward with that. We’ll see, and I’ll let you know if anything works out. “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart…And He shall direct your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5,6)

 

Well, I guess I should sign off for now and get some sleep…I’ll be sure and write some interesting posts soon! (Now I’ve said it and I absolutely HAVE to… :/ )

 

Until next time,

Samantha

 

Now Whatcha Up To?

Once again it’s been way too long since I posted on my blog…So I’m going to do another picture summary of my recent life. Besides, they’re fun to do and I’m told they’re fun to read. Anyway, here goes… 🙂

For one, I’ve gotten a “new” laptop. This one isn’t quite so skilled in trying my patience! 😉

 

Remember how I told you I was memorizing a canvass for YD camp? Now Jonathon and I are doing local canvassing–fundraising for college.

 

Practicing music when I can...

Practicing music when I can…

Hanging out with Jonathon and his friend...

Hanging out with Jonathon and his friend…



I believe I have all the funds needed for Mission Experience!!! This is a pic of me with a bag I got for the trip...

I believe I have all the funds needed for Mission Experience!!! This is a pic of me with a bag I got for the trip…

I just love this pic of the kitties. Puddles on the left, and Sherbert on the right.

I just love this pic of the kitties. Puddles on the left, and Sherbert on the right.

Work, when I have the chance. (These hawks were circling above us while Jonathon and I were painting some weeks ago. There were at least twice as many as are in this picture!)

Work, when I have the chance. (These hawks were circling above us while Jonathon and I were painting some weeks ago. There were at least twice as many as are in this picture!)

Another picture I took at work. This garter snake was fun to play with. (Don't worry, I don't usually take pics at work...Just once in a while. ;) )

Another picture I took at work. This garter snake was fun to play with. (Don’t worry, I don’t usually take pics at work…Just once in a while. 😉 )

Presents WP

Gathering and wrapping presents…

Having fun with "photo shoots" with my little siblings...(It was quite a lot of work to collect all those acorns!!)

Having fun with “photo shoots” with my little siblings…(It was quite a lot of work to collect all those acorns!!)


So, overall I’ve been quite busy. I also shared my first sermon at church about a month ago. I’ve nearly finished a post about that, and I’ll share it soon.

Oh, and the most exciting of all? I’m a High School graduate! I passed all the tests to get my GED (easiest way I know of for a homeschooler to graduate). I love it! 🙂

Until next time,
Samantha

Of Lessons Through Illness

Written October 13, 2012

I sit here tonight, in my cool messy room. My head is a bit painful, I’m congested, and my throat is less than comfortable. WHY???

Well, because you need it.

WHAT???

You need it.

SERIOUSLY???

Yes, my child. You need it. Remember you’re struggling with keeping your voice gentle? Well, I’m offering you some help. 🙂

So I sit. Yes, Lord, I think I understand.

Seems to be going around blogs, these days. I’m sick. Why? And God replies: “I have the best in mind.”

Quite recently I prayed that God would help me with my terrible habit of endless yelling. Raising my voice at the cute 3-year-old because he made a mistake. Or the growing 8-year-old who just never seems to get it.
I posted a while ago about getting quite ill after YD camp and thinking that I had whooping cough. You know how that finally got cured? I quit yelling. That simple. Shortly after, old habits returned…And guess where I am today! My throat hurts!! (I really was sick, and I managed to get over that…but my throat needed rest in order to fully heal…)

You see, I have a dreadful temper. If angered deeply enough I’ve been known to physically be a bit awful. Seems I yell my life away nearly everyday (if not every day). I hate to admit being controlled…but my temper controls me.
(Did you notice in the dialog above the all-caps in my responses? I didn’t think about writing it that way–that’s just what comes naturally to me. I’m frustrated. WHY AM I ALWAYS SICK??? [Isn’t CAPS the online way to yell?] For the record: I’m really not always sick.)

So I ask God for victory…He, in His infinite mercy, grants me some help when I can’t seem to do it on my own.

Last night, I lay on the couch. I was frustrated. I came home from babysitting for the day and suddenly noticed that the tiredness that had been in my eyes all afternoon was fever. I was having difficulties with changing the offices and positions I hold at church. (Last two years I was: chorister, Kindie Sabbath School assistant and greeter. It didn’t work out when different agreements came together and I was the Greeter, Song Leader, and Sabbath School Teacher all in one week! So, this year I’m only accepting Kindie Sabbath School assistant. But, the work is great and the laborers are few.) My room was a mess–and there was NO way I wanted it to stay that way! But I was tired. I told Mom all I wanted to do was sleep…And she said that was probably a good idea. But, no! I didn’t really want to sleep.

My sweet sister then came over and felt my forehead. “Oh, you’re quite hot!” And off she ran. Before long she was back with a cool washcloth and placed it on my head. I said something about freezing to death (quite the exaggeration, and I wasn’t even talking about current situations), but off she ran again. Quickly she returned with her warm feather comforter and snuggled me up cozily, there on the couch. Then she got another bright idea. “May I go in your room, Samantha?” “Uh, I guess” (She didn’t seem in the mood to get into mischief 😉 ) Off she ran again and soon returned with Mr. White. (My teddy bear…that I seem to not sleep well without.) She lifted the blanket and put it in my arms. Touching the washcloth she exclaimed, “this is already quite warm!” and again, off she ran to cool my washcloth. The timer went off and she ran to get dinner out of the oven. Dinner time! I considered getting up out of my cozy bed to get something to eat. Not for long…My dear sister was soon by my side with a plateful of food.

How could I be angry???

It makes me think: God in His great mercy came down to this earth, suffered for me, paid the price for my sins, served His whole life long, went back to Heaven and sent us the Comforter, and is currently preparing a place for me.

How could I be angry???

He did the same for you.

How could you be angry? Or depressed? Or troubled?

Jesus longs to give rest to the weary soul. I think it’s about time we ask, don’t you?

“Dear Father, thank you so much for coming down to this dreary place to save us. I pray that you would draw very near to all who would read this, that you would grant them the peace you have promised (John 14:27). I thank you for hearing and answering this prayer. In Jesus’ precious name. Amen.”

This is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us!

Until next time,

Samantha

Happy Birthday to me…

So just a couple weekends ago I had another birthday. It was on Sabbath and therefore was extra special to me, besides the fact that to me, this is a milestone year.

But, even all that could not slightly compare to the beautiful morning that I spent with God.

The day before I had resolved to make the last day of my current year the best it could be. I wanted to look back and remember it as a positive day. Then I’d have a great start to the next year, as well!

There is just something so special about spending time close to God. Close to His throne. In His presence.

That Sabbath/birthday morning I could feel God’s presence, and hear His voice so clearly. It was as though my bedroom floor was holy ground. It had been a long time since I was really up early enough to be able to spend time with my Savior in perfect silence–to truly “be still”.

And all I have to say to you is this: “Be still and know that He is God!”  It’s an awesome experience.

During that time, I decided that I was finally going to write a sermon like my Pastor has suggested (or rather requested). (I told God that I so enjoyed the peace in my heart that nothing could stop me from sharing Him with others…careful what you tell God!) I’m eager to share, yes, (how could you not be??) but I am also quite nervous! I’d appreciate your prayers, I don’t like talking!

But, you know what I learned that beautiful morning? When my Lord is by my side, I have absolutely nothing to fear!

 

Pressing Heavenward,

Samantha

What’s Up?

Well, I have to say I’m VERY glad that I said in my last post that I would likely not be posting quite so often anymore!  Somehow life gets super busy and with a computer that has quite the temper (and is challenging me to control my temper) writing blog posts seems to go pretty low on my list of things to do.

So anyway here are a few of the things I’m up to…

Memorizing a canvass for Literature Evangelism class at YD camp next week. I’m SO excited!!! 😉 (Got this just a couple days ago…My brain is about tired of memorization!)

Weed-whacking at the church…and elsewhere. (I took this pic-kinda goofy…)

LOTS of Algebra (this is my Mom’s paper, she was waiting for my computer to load…) 🙂

Mountain biking with Jonathon at Applegate Lake…

Quotes from an old phone book… 🙂

Can’t forget to spend time in the Bible and other inspiring books!

Writing poems at work…My weed-whacker broke down.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So, in case you didn’t catch it Jonathon and I will be leaving this Sabbath (Saturday) headed for YD. Considering it is a 12 1/2 hour drive from here and Jonathon is the only driver going we’re going to sleep about half-way there for a while and then spend part of Sunday morning at the waterfalls we stopped at on the way to WWU.

Also, I would really appreciate if you’d pray for Christian Berdahl. He needs our prayers! (I have permission to share this…) He is having serious trouble with his back (bulging disk, bulging into his spinal cord) and has a speaking engagement this weekend. He is in quite a lot of pain-as you’d imagine!-and is asking that we pray that he’ll still be able to fulfill his commitment in WA this Sabbath.

I want to go home, my friends! This world is quickly becoming very overwhelming to me. For quite a while I lived a very secluded life where I never let anyone in, and now that I’ve decided to live a better life I see that so many people are hurting and it just breaks my heart! I battle with “a lump in my throat” as I write this, thinking about those who are hurting, sick, dying, or recently passed away. (And not only in physical ways…)
Let’s all do our part to hasten Christ’s coming, shall we?